Fun with Pre-Menopause

I’ve had trouble with short term memory for the last few years. It really kicked in around the time The Ex moved out and has been snowballing since. It started as small things, like not remembering dates and appointments, forgetting to pay bills, and just having a hard time keeping everyone where and when they needed to be. I was at The Big One’s Field Day when she was in the fifth grade, and a woman came over and spoke to me, with specificity, about her. I chatted with her for a good two to three minutes and made small talk.

I had no idea who she was.

I asked another mom who she was, thinking she was another parent. Turned out, she was The Big One’s teacher.

This was a woman who I talked to face-to-face a couple of times a month when I volunteered in the classroom.

Absolutely no recognition.

That shook me up a bit.

My mother chalked it up to the fact I was working several jobs and juggling that with kids and school, and said I just had too much information to process and retain. I started writing everything down and carrying a calendar with me at all times. A few months later, I was diagnosed with ADD and started taking medication.

Say what you will about ADD being over-diagnosed, but the meds are awesome. I lost 17 pounds in 3 months. That alone was worth the diagnosis. And my memory and concentration improved somewhat.

But it seems lately that the memory is failing again. I thought it was I’d gotten lazy about calendaring, but last week I was driving to one of my part-time gigs and drove to the wrong venue, even though I was aware it was at another.

When I finally got to the correct venue, I was lamenting the memory loss situation to one of my co-workers. She said she did the same thing. Her diagnosis? “Pre-menopause.”

What? I’m too young!!! Besides I still get my period, complete with cramps I had like a teenager, have no hot flashes or night sweats, and have no mood swings.

OK, scratch that last one.

So I did what medical experts like Jenny McCarthy do – I googled it.

I think my co-worker may be right about this one.

So I found the name of a supplement that I thought might help, wrote it down on a sticky note, and put it in my purse.

The Big One and I headed to the Whole Foods and I started digging in my purse for the note.

I couldn’t find it anywhere.

I knew the supplement began with an “M” so I looked through all the “M” supplements.

Here’s what I learned: The Whole Foods has a boat load of supplements, beginning with ALL the letters of the alphabet.

I gave up on looking for the elusive “M” supplement and picked up some black cohosh, which also came recommended, and we headed to the checkout.

When we got there, I remembered I’d left my wallet on the console of the car. EVEN AFTER I had reminded myself to pick it up BEFORE we went into the store. So I went back to the car, got my wallet and lo, and behold, there was the sticky note.

That I had put in my wallet so I wouldn’t forget it.

Back to the supplements to search for “macafem.” We didn’t find it, so we went back to the check out.

As we were leaving the store, The Big One asked what the supplements were for, and I told her.

She said, “You should probably buy more.”

Just wait. Paybacks are hell.